


In Absentia

by upquarkAO3



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Apologies, Chloe's machine mind starts to click in, Gen, Girl (term used loosely when you see all of whom and how its implying) Power, Lucifer's cluttered headspace, More tags added, Mum is still a hot mess, but he's a good bro, cellie convos, desperate people call for desperate measures, it was awful, literally (literarily?), so the OC ain't really that O, that was a play on words
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-16
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-05 23:54:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10320449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/upquarkAO3/pseuds/upquarkAO3
Summary: Interim break S2 post Ep-13. Canon-compliant (mostly). What kinds of conversations might you have if the loose ends you were trying to tie up only left enough rope to hang yourself with? That may or may not be a metaphor.





	1. Lucifer Morningstar Please Phone Home

**Author's Note:**

> First conversations. Few redeeming qualities.

 

  
“Who the hell is this?"

  
“Well, exactly I suppose. Not the exact locale however. Not yet, any road.”

  
“Lucifer?!”

  
“ ** _Yes_** , Maze. Gone daft in my absence have you? Hasn’t been that long, has it?”

  
“Shut up and talk. What’s this number you’re calling from? And where are you??!”

  
“Those trifling details are of no great importance.”

  
“Uh, there are more than a few people here, AND **ME** TOO, who would beg to differ with  that ridiculous statement.”

  
“Yes well, can’t be helped I’m afraid.”

  
“Liar.”

  
“You know I’m not.”

  
“No. I know….but I know something else, too.”

  
“Do you now? And what’s that?”

  
“You might be a truth-teller, but only your version of it. Only what **you’re** aware of.”

  
“Is there a point to this diatribe? Patience has never been my greatest virtue and it’s a bit at a low ebb now, my dear demon.”

  
“YES. How can stay away after…you know. With you and her. Hell, how could you leave in the first place?”

  
“You know why. Or have you **truly** gone daft? I was in jest earlier…perhaps I shouldn’t have been if your mental state is so precarious…”

  
“Stop. Chloe doesn’t know, Lucifer. About how she came into being.”

  
“I’m aware of that, Maze. Amenadiel told me. Under some brotherly duress but that’s inconsequential as well. I believed him.”

  
“So…why…?”

  
“You ARE bloody daft! The Detective is here on this plane of existence because she’s, and by extrapolation ME, acting a part of my father’s design! Another cog in his ludicrous Rube Goldberg-esque machine of existence! It’s not enough I’m to be shunted about overtly in roles I’ve never wished to play; now I’m to have my virginal heart teased and tricked as well? Made to do his bidding – whatever or HOWever that entails – because he’s finally pulled a page from Mum’s book and decided to play sly? Well, no THANK you to THAT!”

  
“Lucifer….”

  
_**“WHAT?!”** _

  
“Stop. Seriously, think. Please. You’d spite yourself – and Chloe – horribly just on the off chance it would piss your dad off more? Don’t you have more to lose than him?”

  
“What rubbish are you prattling on about now?”

  
“ I mean, yes, Chloe’s life was in his hands…but aren’t all of them in some way? Each human?”

  
“For the sake of the argument you seem bent upon us having, perhaps - what of it then? So?”

  
“So, what’s the difference HOW she came into being? It’s not like anyone could know what would happen when **and if** you two met, right? And look what you have a chance at…a chance you’re screwing up more and more the longer you stay away. Right?”

  
….

  
“ **Right**?”

  
….

  
“Lucifer?!”

  
“Yes, yes, I’m still here.”

  
“Well?!”

  
“I have to go.”

  
“Lucifer!”

  
“This was a mistake. Goodbye, Maze.”

  
“No – wait! Why did you call? Tell me that anyway.”

  
….

  
“Was it because you wanted to know how Chloe was? If she was okay?”

  
….

  
“She isn’t, for what it’s worth.”

  
….

  
“What do you have to say to that?”

  
….

  
“WELL?”

  
“She will be in my absence, Mazikeen. She’ll have a much greater chance at happiness without me.”

  
“Lucifer, no…you don’t know that…”

  
“Good thing you’re there to mop up the messy bits. I do thank you for that small kindness. You have indeed become a friend to these creatures you used to despise.”

  
“Maybe. Yeah fine, okay. But I was  your friend first.”

  
“Certainly not. We were many things; ‘friendship’ certainly not among them.”

  
“You’re wrong but whatever. And we are **now**. You know that too, stubborn ass that you are. And I am telling you **as your friend** that the mistake you have made is just compounding the longer you take to fix it. Come back.”

  
“No. That is where you’re wrong, ‘my friend’. A clean slate untainted by superfluous noise such as friendship or hope, or lo-…or _**anything**_ …I think is best for everyone.”

  
“Lucifer!”

  
“Goodbye Mazikeen. Thanks for all you’ve done. For what it’s worth, I appreciated it. You. Mostly.”

  
“Lucifer, wait!”

  
….

  
“Lucifer?”

  
….

  
“ **LUCIFER**?!”

  
….

  
“… _oh, lucifer_ …”

 

**> >>>>>>**

 

“Yes?”

  
“Hello, brother.”

  
“Luci! Where are you?”

  
“No matter; I just called to say…”

  
“What do you mean ‘no matter’? How can you say that?!”

  
“Simple. I open my mouth and intended words fall out. I do have the gift of a silver tongue…among others. Including other gifts with said appendage, but I digress. I mean, other talents I plan to utilize sooner rather than later…”

  
“What on earth are you talking about?”

  
“No, no, no…that’s where you’re in error, brother. Not ‘on earth’ at all. Not for this act in the play I never wanted to be part of. Oh no, not at all.”

  
“Luci…”

  
“Just wanted you and Mum to keep clear. If you know what’s good for you.”

  
“’Keep clear’ of what? What are you planning?!”

  
“I assure you, that will be quite obvious. No need for worry on that account.”

  
“But…you mean…”

  
“Rest assured brother, change is coming. Second coming even, one might say.”

  
“LUCIFER!”

  
….

  
“Lucifer?!”

  
….

  
“… _Luci… little brother…oh **no**_ ….”

 

**> >>>>>>>**

 

“Hello?”

  
“Doctor.”

  
“LUCIFER! Oh thank, G-”

  
“Careful now.”

  
“Sorry; habit. Are you okay? Wait, no: that was stupid. Obviously not. Where are you?”

  
“It doesn’t matter. Not in the slightest. I merely -”

  
“Lucifer. Please. Stop. Think. Come back.”

  
“I’m afraid I can’t, my dear.”

  
“Can’t or won’t?”

  
“What’s the difference? The end result’s the same. As mine has ever been. You should be proud of me in fact, Doctor. I’ve finally stopped running from the inevitable.”

  
“I think it’s a safe bet to say ‘you’re still running away’, but please – do go on.”

  
“Ah, the tactical logician hard at work. Another constant.”

  
“Yes well, it comes with the territory. I won’t apologize for that.”

  
“And why should you? ‘Know thyself’. Play to your strengths, darling. I certainly will be.”

  
“What do you mean?”

  
“Now you can color **me** surprised, Linda. Really, I’d have thought all those recent yanks up the steep learning curve would have generated a little interest…a little research not just on who I am… _ **but what I’m for**_.”

  
“And what is that, Lucifer? Your  own opinion, not some dusty tome or mob mentality nonsense.”

  
“Well my dear, it’s simple really. Destruction. Of my Father’s creation….and then the inevitable denouement.”

  
“And what’s that?”

  
“Of myself, naturally.”

  
“Lucifer, you can’t mean…”

  
“Oh, but I can! It **is** literally what I’m made for. My birthright bestowed upon me as a hateful legacy. I’ve spent far too long fighting it and I tire of the struggle.”

  
“No. Stop. You’re not…”

  
“I am. That’s a powerful phrase, you know. Galvanizations of all kinds stem from those simple words.”

  
“No! I know you! You’re kind, and generous and…”

  
“Please. I was quite literally under your body and in front of your face for an extended period of time before you saw but a glimpse of my mere appearance! What more do you think you might’ve missed? Reams, I assure you.”

  
“… _lucifer, no_ …”

  
“Linda, yes. But you did try. Harder than many – most even. Including my family not that there’s much lost there. I want you to know you have nothing to feel badly for. The effort… **your** effort on my behalf…it was humbling to experience as I haven’t often. Thank you for that.”

  
“Lucifer please. Come back. Come back to your home here. Come back to the people – or whatevers - that want to help you. Who love you.”

  
“ **Doctor** …”

  
“Lucifer, PLEASE. Please listen to me. We can work through this; just come back.”

  
“No, my dear. Unfortunately that path’s washed out. Time to forge a new one. Well…not **that** new I suppose.”

  
“…no…”

  
“Thank you, Doctor.  Linda. Yes, names are so very important, aren’t they? All of them, really. Thank you my dear Linda, for every kindness shown. And fret not: despite what you may think you shan’t see me again. You’ve no place where I’ve recently held sway.”

  
“Lucifer!”

  
….

  
“Lucifer…?”

  
….

  
‘…*sob*…’

 

**> >>>>>**

 

“Yeah? Dan here. Go.”

  
“Daniel, focus that enhanced simian brain of yours and pay attention…”

  
“ **Lucifer**? What the hell?! Where are….”

  
“Ugh, this is getting tiresome. **Daniel**.  Pay attention, I said.”

  
“What?! Where…”

  
“Dearie me, I have neither time nor inclination for ‘Twenty-Questions Geography Version’! So mouth shut ears open, yeah?”

  
“Fine. Okay. What?”

  
“Go to your bank first thing on Monday morning. You will find that there is a new account annexed to that paltry husk you call a savings….”

  
“…wait, how did you… _such a **dick**_ …”

  
“Sorry, something to say? No, I thought not. Any road, it’s for the sp-. It’s for Trixie. College, car, copious amounts of therapy as she’s your child; what have you…little nest egg for whatever she needs. Hatch it carefully; too much freedom leads to ruin. I should know.”

  
“What?”

  
“Honestly, you all have gone both deaf and daft! This is a simple matter; purely fiscal. Should rather be bringing charges against the imp what with all the unwarranted mauling I’ve endured from that tiny tentacled creature. It’s clearly a case of substandard parenting when the children are allowed to run amok; I know that as well. Now heed: you and…well…her parents are in dangerous employ. I’m simply making certain your offspring ought not suffer hardship should harm ever befall those charged with her care. No progeny should suffer because of their elders’ lack of foresight. Ever. That is all.”

  
“Lucifer, I…”

  
“ _ **I said**_ , ‘that is all’, Detective!”

  
“Lucifer?”

  
….

  
“Lucifer?! C’mon, man.”

  
….

  
“…oh, **shit**.”

 

**> >>>>**

 

“Decker.”

  
….

  
“Hello?”

  
….

  
“Anyone there? Hello?

  
….

  
“ _Lucifer?!_ Is this you?”

  
….

  
“Don’t hang up! Where are you??!”

  
….

  
“Lucifer, please.”

  
….

  
“Just tell me…just tell me why.”

  
….

  
“ Why did you leave? I thought…I mean, I thought that we…”

  
….

  
“But I guess I was wrong.”

 

  
….

  
“No. You know what? I’m not. I’m not wrong.”

  
….

  
“You are, for doing this. For leaving me. Us. Even before there’s an ‘us’ to be! How is that even possible? After everything that’s happened? Linda and Maze told me…told me what you wouldn’t say. No, that’s not fair – you did. What I couldn’t hear, I guess. Lucifer, I’m so sorry. In my defense it is BEYOND crazy…still acclimating…c’mon now; you have to give me a break on this – you knew how I thought of this stuff. *sigh* But for that loss, for you hiding yourself…for you feeling as if you had to carry that burden alone…you didn’t have to, you know. You don’t.”

  
….

  
“Whatever else you are, you’re my **partner**.”

  
….

  
“And I’m  yours. Take it how you want. You **know** that. But I’m not a doormat either, and you should know that too.”

  
….

  
“Just - come back, please. Come home.”

  
….

  
“I won’t be angry. Well. I’ll try not to be. You do make that difficult sometimes.”

  
….

  
“I was kidding!”

  
….

  
“Sort of…but really.  Come home. I need my eggs.”

  
….

  
“I need you.”

  
….

  
“And you know what? You need me, too.”

  
….

  
“Lucifer…please….”

  
….

  
….

  
….

 

It was easier to throw the cheap phone into the hungry maw of the sea as simply listening to Chloe’s voice, and then her reciprocal silence was far harder than he’d thought. He couldn’t even say…well. It didn’t matter. Not anymore.

  
Nothing did.

  
Nothing mattered except for what was coming next.

  
Hands in his pockets, brow furrowed against the wind and dark eyes narrowing at the storm brewing upon the evening horizon, Lucifer sucked in a slow breath between clenched teeth.

  
“The waiting game’s drawing to a close now, Dad. Homecoming at long last for your most infamous prodigal.”

  
Far out to sea a single shaft of lightning flickered. As the low growl of thunder rolled over the whitecaps seconds later, Lucifer met it with a simple grin and the reciprocating flash of crimson in his eyes reflected the dull orange skies ahead of the squall.

  
“Here I come then, ready or not..."

Another crack of lightning, closer. Louder grumble of thunder. A malevolently teeth-baring rictus from the figure balanced on slushy sand of the tideline.

"... olly-olly-oxen-free….”


	2. Jesus Christ, Superstar...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOT intended sacrilegious toward those who go for organized religion at all. Truly. Just one (of too many, lol) ideas regarding potential backstory for the Devil in this Luciverse. I mean, c'mon. Who didn't notice the total disdain Lucifer had for Ella calling him 'Luce' early S2? Why might that be (other than the obvious nosiness and overly baked, unearned familiarity from the lil' human upstart?)
> 
> What if it was because the nick was one given by a beloved brother long absent?

The next gust of wind was so strong it made Lucifer briefly squinch his eyes against the stinging grains.

“Vindictive bastard,” he hissed, scrubbing at his face with his hands. “…think a little flying dirt’s enough to cow me? Well, you’ve got another think coming, Father Dearest.”

“You really  **are** a drama demagogue, aren’t you? Nice to know  some things haven’t changed.”

The voice was…familiar. The language spoken, Aramaic, was most definitely NOT. Not recently. And not on a California coastline anyway.

“ **FINALLY** . So it’s to be an in-person tete a tete, yeah?  GOOD . Because I’ve some  **most** pressing issues to address before I render mayh-”

“Jesus Christ, Luce.” A snicker. “Open your eyes. First literally, then figuratively, okay?”

Scouring more frantically, he did. Lucifer blinked. Blinked again. Turned. Kept blinking. With a final swipe to his gritty eyes with his Boglioli pocket square he blearily took in his surroundings.

The damp sand at the waterline was replaced by grit and scree. The salt of the air and heat of the early West Coast evening were gone, replaced by arid chill. And a misplaced sun. Still squinting slightly Lucifer faced east to where the faint glow of dawn was just beginning to wash the unfamiliar landscape in the most extraordinary colors.

“What the…?”

“Ah, ah, ah…wrong! Hah, I love when you are as that is a LOT of fun to say. We’re not in Hell. You’ve had enough of that place, haven’t you? I’d think so as a mere three Earth days was certainly adequate for me although you  were a gracious host all things considered. And humor me; speak my old language. It’s a little guttural but I’ve missed it.”

Lucifer whipped to the source of the voice. Sitting nearby on a large boulder was a smaller, swarthy man with kind eyes and tousled curls, both the color of rich, expensive chocolate.

"You were expecting a blue-eyed blonde, maybe?"

A snarling twang rattled through Lucifer at the thought of Chloe, but he knew the jibe wasn't intended to be a source of pain. Merely a poke at the centuries of whitewashing.

**_“Yeshua?!”_ **

“In the flesh! Like  **I** have any other option, though. Sort of comes with the whole ‘knitted in a human womb’ deal.  Never understood why those of you offered more possibilities would choose this model: the squishy-on-the-outside-with-most-sensory-parts-on-an-easily-detachable-stalked-nub-tippy-bipedal thing just isn’t that practical. But hey, free choice. That always WAS your thing so…who am I to judge taste? Anyway, your version looks pretty enough. Always were a stickler for high-end anything, if not perfection. Of course couple that with your penchant for being a giant pain in everyone’s ass and it’s just a recipe for disaster. Looks like that hasn’t changed either, has it? Case in point: your current agenda.”

The man grinned saucily, and the bright shine of his smile glowed neutrino-like right through Lucifer’s battered heart. His youngest brother had always been his very favorite; not that he’d ever say that aloud. But the uptilted lines along his mouth and eyes must’ve given his secret away as Yeshua grinned even wider.

“Come on, Luce. I know you missed me. And deserts seem to be where we’ve had our best conversations in recent ages, which is convenient as your near-infinite density makes it tough for me to haul your hide far. Besides, I thought this one was gorgeous. You’re clearly still into aesthetics, right? So, what do you think? Will it do?” The man swept out a hand over the topography slowly emerging from night’s pall and Lucifer’s line of sight followed the arc of his brother’s movement.

Brilliant trills of color licked down the intricate walls of the canyons unfolding below them, the contrast of light and darkness both made more exquisite for the juxtaposition. Both beautiful in their way.

“More tints than Judea. I will concede you that. And what on earth are you laughing at?!”

“Well, the accent for one. THAT’S a new twist. Sorry, sorry!” Chuckling, Yeshua held his hands up mock-defensively front of himself at Lucifer’s lemon-sucking scowl. “It suits you; in a way. Like that, uh…’suit’. Certainly still are a peacock aren’t you?”

“Shut it. Look who’s talking. A little personal pride can’t be a cardinal sin now can it?” Lucifer good-naturedly flipped a hand in feigned annoyance at the casual garb on the other.  _ His brother _ …he just wanted to…what? Clutch him tightly to make sure he was real? Please. Allow himself to be distracted? No,  **no** there was too much to do, but…

Yeshua was laughing even harder. And the low, melodious roll of it pulled at the musician’s spirit in Lucifer like almost nothing else could. Easy joy was the sweetest of sounds and the composer of all dearly missed painting galactic harmonies with it.

No , enough.

He shook his head, trying to clear the roil of his thoughts. Yeshua was here, with him, after so long. How? More pertinently,  why ? But he was still talking in that language so long unfamiliar.

“…well the Zero B.C.E. fashion of floppy pants and toga top just isn’t all that practical for the moment. Besides, I like these. Don’t you? I mean, c’mon – how much more cheerful can viable footwear get?”

They both looked down from the plain cotton T to the thick, denim-clad legs to bare dusty toes wiggling in rainbow-patterned Tevas. Yeshua made a silly face at him, white teeth shining against the dark amber of his skin. The only deserving response was a snort, so Lucifer did.

“You’re ridiculous. You simply must know this.”

“Says the willful archangel who left his assignment to fool around on a mortal plane and then decide to bring his part of the end of existence-as-mortal-creatures-know-it right to Father’s doorstep? Riiiiiiiiight. Much more reasonable.”

Lucifer fumed. Glaring at the sobering expression on his brother’s face he could feel his eyes flare.

“Oh, get over the snit already. Remember, I’ve seen your form much scarier so that little party trick won’t unnerve me –  I know you .  **You love me** . You’d fall on that blade yourself before you’d harm a hair on my fat noggin. You were the only one…the ONLY one out of ALL of them who tried to talk me out of what I came for here back then. I love the rest too, but don’t think for an instant I’ve forgotten the solo aspect of your effort either.”

Lucifer tried to wave the sentiment away with a slash of his hand. “ **Put** here for, you mean. Against your will…Father didn’t even ASK you…just sent you along willy-nilly without a care for your well-being.” Lucifer turned away slightly, clenching tighter to the celestial hilt he’d forgotten about until just now.

“No, true; he didn’t. Ask, that was. But just because it wasn’t initially my idea doesn’t mean it wasn’t a good one. I chose to develop and follow through with it because I agreed with the premise; can’t think of  _ everything _ .  Are you saying I’m not allowed  **my** choices? That only  you get that option? Seems a little hypocritical to me, Luce.”

“ **_THEY DESTROYED YOU!_ **  Those…stinging insects… tortured you ; pierced your body to failure, BETRAYED YOU! And not just the mobs…your friends…those  **_friends_ **  you held so precious…” Lucifer nearly spat the word in his rage, “… **they** betrayed  you ! How could you allow it?! How? Knowing where it would lead?” Lucifer’s beautiful voice was ragged. He’d never understood, never, the lack of self-preservation his favorite sibling had. He’d never stood defiant in front of their father nor the paltry mortals who’d rent his body asunder. And his friends…his ‘family’… tolerating it…Yeshua’s own birth mother bearing in silence the destruction of the adopted son she’d provided safe passage for to come into this plane through her very flesh. The lovely child she’d carried only to watch him die horribly. They all  deserved the pain the logical conclusion to their choices wrought upon them. No amount of tears, lavishly anointed funeral oils and spices after the fact could make up for their lack of action to prevent the anguish of his physical death.  _ They deserved no pity _ .

“You sound like Mom.”

Lucifer was so stupefied by the sadly gentle words that he was rendered speechless. He could only gape as Yeshua bathed him with a calm smile, trying to warm the deep intrinsic chill his older brother had carried since his Fall. As he always would try, although he hadn’t been successful yet. The effort had to be enough sometimes.

“The ‘stinging insect’ remark, specifically. Aren’t you truly friends with some humans now, yourself? Find ‘em interesting? Don’t you even  **love** one of them? THAT must’ve been a shock to discover. I think even Uriel was surprised at that twist.”

“What…?” the sound was a cracking hiss, barely audible. He tried again, “You know…you know about…?” Lucifer faltered again, not even certain to which tragedy he was referring. Love or loss? Did it matter? Weren’t they one and the same?

He slumped to the rocky ground with his head in his hands, the blade clattering sharply down beside him. Sparks thrown over the ringing stones stung his leg but he barely noticed. He closed his eyes. Too much. Just…too much, always. And ‘too much’ never seemed to let up from any quarter. He was exhausted from trying to bear this…never any escape, never any path to freedom, never any succor, or even reason or…anything. Nothing. Just…unending nothing….always.

And try as he had otherwise, he felt the hollowness calling him again. The bliss of oblivion was a siren song he’d darkly courted since time out of mind despite the occasional sweeter melodies. Too infrequent. Too faint. Too transient. He didn’t deserve those, no. That had been made abundantly clear to him long ago. No rescue coming for the Devil.

After a moment he felt Yeshua settle beside him, but he didn’t move. Couldn’t.

“Seeing you in pain has always broken me. You know this. I’ve told you. And how can you willingly hurt someone who loves you as I do? Why would you want to?” Yeshua watched his brother shake his head, not negating the blistering words said without accusation in the quiet voice, but struggling to distance himself from the pain he heard. So he pushed back harder, as he always had when it came to Lucifer.

“Why do you think I spent so much time with you in Hell? Yes, it was only three of these earth days but *you know better than any sentience* other than Dad how linear time is warped there. And you’ve had so much longer….

He got quieter. “I know the reason why you finally left, Lucifer. Left Hell. Left your new home. It wasn’t a vacation or escape you were seeking.”

At Lucifer’s sharp intake of breath Yeshua knew he was correct, and it nearly crushed him.

“Let me help, since you won’t allow those human friends of yours to. Y’know…the ones  you abandoned? Like you accused mine of doing.”

Lucifer felt the steady warmth of a strong shoulder lean in on his and as much as he wanted to reject the comfort on principle as he always had, he was too drained. Weary of it all. Too much, still.

“I can’t.” It was barely a whisper.

The lean became a light embrace. Not an additional burden. Support.  Freely offered but even this little relief almost impossible to accept. “No, not ‘can’t’. ‘Won’t’. And you  know the difference. And why it’s so important. You also know the price. We’re supposed to be a restoration  team , remember? You hone out the impurities and I salvage when they’re cleared.  **We** thought of this! But Luce…not one soul has been successful… _ not one in over two thousand years since we came up with this _ …and if it won’t work in this tiny little backwater rocky jewel of a world then what will become of all the others? In all the universes past and yet to be? All that mortal sentience…intelligence… it’s a waste to be cordoned away indefinitely.  **You know this as no one else can** . And you,  you above all us children detest when there’s no rationale, right? When nothing makes sense? Otherwise why keep ranting that tired whine at Dad when  **you’re** doing the same thing? You have to show them HOW. You’re far stronger and your vision eclipses mortals’ by far. Enough to see the limitations of God himself, right? Turn that into some introspection, won’t you?”

Lucifer lifted his face to look out at the sun finally peeking over the edge of the eastern horizon. The colors of the desert were brighter now, and the light reached further into the deeply labyrinthine geography. There was still darkness. Still contrast.

“I’ve tried. Have been trying, actually. And I can hear what you’re saying…”

“But you can’t do it. Not yet. Am I right?”

“I’m afraid not.”

A sigh. Then a more snug wrap of that sturdy arm across his back. Another tiny smile creeping into that beloved voice. “It’s okay. We have forever, right? I’ll be ready whenever you are. You’re worth waiting for even if you are the most spectacular jerk I know.”

Lucifer couldn’t match the optimism.

“Not all of us have forever, now. I don’t deserve it either. Don’t even want it sometimes.” Lucifer was thinking of Uriel. He’d never killed. And this particular loss; this was irrecoverable as no other deficit he’d ever borne. He’d shunted the horror of it down and away into the fetid trenches of his vast mind, but he’d been filling to overflowing for so long the vileness of it all was seeping away from his control.

Surprisingly, he felt Yeshua just shaking his head slightly where he’d rested it upon Lucifer’s arm. “Still so you. Still think you know everything. Still wrong sometimes.”

Lucifer rolled his shoulder to pop him in the cheek with mild irritation, but was secretly pleased when the strong arm stayed ‘round his back. “What  **are** you nattering on about?”

“Not for me to say.”

“Oh, going cryptic are you then?  _ ‘You sound like Mum’ _ .”

Yeshua had the grace to snicker derisively at the mocking mimic. He became more solemn when Lucifer asked his next question.

“No, Luce. I don’t hear from Dad. No one does…I thought you knew….”

Lucifer pulled away to face his brother straight on. “Knew what?”

Yeshua dropped his eyes and started fiddling with a few bright pebbles. His frustration and annoyance threatening to boil over Lucifer slapped them out of his hands. For a second livid incandescence lit in Yeshua’s eyes and Lucifer suddenly recalled he wasn’t the only son with a terrible temper. The lion’s heart lay always in wait under the skin of the lamb. He looked away quickly.

“I apologize. Just… **what** **are** you talking about?”

“Accepted.”

Despite his exasperated apprehension, Lucifer’s heart melted all over again. His little brother was so dear to him; always had been and all for the reasons he’d never fully comprehend. A sacred mystery indeed. Paramount being he forgave so easily. Always had; truly and completely. Himself as well: it was simultaneously Yeshua’s greatest strength and most profound vulnerability. Lucifer nodded in a ‘please continue’ gesture.

“Okay, well…not long after you left…”

“…rather civilized way to put it…”

This time Yeshua slapped  his crossed knee in mild admonishment before continuing. “As I was saying, not long after, Dad kinda went…dark, for lack of a better concept.”

“’Dark’ like ‘malevolent’, or…?”

“No. Like ‘absent’. More so than he had been. Which is saying something, right? It sent Mom screeching over the edge…literally as you know since you had custody of her afterwards. How is she, anyway?”

“She’s Mum.” Lucifer circled one graceful hand, the motion simultaneously indicating ‘status quo’ and ‘get on with it, will you’.

“Okay…well not long after  that some of us,” he shook his head at the silent query of Lucifer’s thick eyebrows before continuing, “… **some** of us went looking for him. But we weren’t expecting what we found; or rather  didn’t find.”

“Which was??? Come, come; you’re a terrible storyteller – no wonder you spoke in parable and nothing decently coherent is left of your little traipse upon this earth.”

“No Luce, really…this is difficult to describe. Dad is just…”

“Dead? Gone? Nietzsche right all along? I find that hard to believe. He’s too stubborn.”

“Yeah…always wondered where you got that,” Yeshua added sarcastically.

“If those Christians could see you now. Scuffed up, hippified and brimming with sass for your elders.” Lucifer side-eyed him and elbowed his ribs.

“Ow. Glad you didn’t poke my stigmata side…”

“You’re not SERIOUSLY still wearing those wounds are you? This manifestation is your ‘before’ vessel, is it not?” Lucifer was appalled at the very idea.

“Yes it is, not like any intelligent celestial being would ever  **choose** to mar themselves, right? Or parade around flaunting their damage and yapping about it? Because THAT would certainly be stupid, WOULDN’T IT?” The retort was sharp and Lucifer actually found his cheeks flushing.

“Anyway…you were saying….”

Yeshua sighed. If his time hadn’t been growing so short he’d have liked to spend it otherwise. Lucifer seemed to…need more solace than he could ask for just now. But free will and those who chose it meant that everyone –  **_everyone_ ** \- celestial or otherwise had to respect that choice in others as well as the consequences. A simple fact that Lucifer himself had recently seemed to forget, Yeshua thought incredulously. Even if their father HAD wanted Lucifer to fall in love, or the human woman with him…their free will negated that outside influence.

**_The simultaneous miracle and tragedy of free will._ **

Not even the divine could encroach upon it.  How could Lucifer have forgotten?  **How** ?! After all he’d suffered - still endured - to achieve it for himself…and by proxy, won the chance for other celestials who wished it?

But not all did.

Especially when they saw the horror it could bring to one of their own.

A horror so great that a God reeling with despair had finally bled himself out across all of existence; exchanging his individual sentience for the most intrinsic of connections. To touch the opportunity that had been lost somehow, if only in ripple and eddy. The vast energy and power of him part of each iota of intelligence that had been, was presently, and ever could be. But the absence of his collected presence further unbalanced his partner…and skewed more than just their family.

But the true scholars and the lucid dreamers felt the divine echoes and had it right. God WAS in and of all things. The Ein-Sof at the heart of the spark. But oh…that meant dilution. That also meant no absolutes without God condensed as ‘himself’  **in** a self. And no absolution, either…only what intelligent beings mortal or otherwise could learn to wield.

Yeshua turned his head, considering his brother’s downcast profile sadly. So lovingly crafted, he’d been. So beautifully intended. So much unrealized potential. And if something with the inherent capability of all the power and intelligence Lucifer had, or his mother or the  other ones gone truly dark with rage and madness – if such as those could not find their way back…then it was all for naught. All of it.

Because the absence of God wouldn’t need Lucifer’s fury to bring the Grand Experiment of Creation to a close: the inevitable conclusion of the tangent they were all on ensured that entropy alone would eventually take care of that.

How to say this? How to make him hear so he’d truly understand? And recall  enough after Yeshua would wipe his brother’s memory of their sunrise conversation…because at his Fall, God had tasked all his remaining children with the awful burden that Lucifer was to be forever unaided as a consequence of his actions. It was a logistic impossibility some couldn’t bear and they followed, twisting out of their true with the distance. But there had to be something, anything….

However, Lucifer wasn’t the only one who bent rules he thought foolish. His brother needed him. Yeshua loved him. How could he not help? Somehow...

“Lost in thought – or are you praying,  _ that’s _ foolish. Never an answer either way….”

Yeshua sighed. Yes, he DID love him. It DID NOT, however, make Lucifer any less of a divine pain in the ass. And he was still snarking away, that Welsh affectation of his making the Aramaic he was speaking sound more tangled than a Gordian knot woven by toddlers scraping the stratosphere on high-octane sugar highs.

Hoping to shut him up  _ (for once) _ , Yeshua snarked back with, “…not one  you’d expect.”

To his surprise, Lucifer grinned that Cheshire winner of his. “Still in cryptic-mode, eh?”

Suddenly aware of time’s clasp, Yeshua threw an arm around Lucifer’s neck and placed an earnest hand over his chest. He held him close, feeling the startled beat of his borrowed human heart. Whispered to him, “You’ll forget what we said. What you learned. But please, oh please my dear one remember the beauty of all the dawning colors and the richness of the darkness that made them so bright. Remember being together. Feeling you’re a part of everything, because you  **are** , and it’s  all more beautiful because you exist…this is my little gift for the favorite I should not have. I love you.”

As the sun fully breached the jagged line of the eastern horizon the radiance was yet eclipsed by the sudden glow of Yeshua’s hand over Lucifer’s heart.

And then time inside Yeshua’s defiant little bubble came to a screeching halt. Outside it as well.

Because none of his children, not one, despite the best of their intentions…and yes…also the worst, ever knew as much as they thought they did.

Honestly.

**_Children._ **

**They were enough to try anyone’s patience sometimes **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the OC should be familiar...I hope :-) Yeshua (Jesus) has taken Lucifer to The Painted Desert which is also proximal to the Petrified Forest in AZ. These places are amazing and if you can go, it's well worth the trip. If you can't, please look at pictures, esp ones from the Park Service sites and consider supporting wilderness areas in the US and abroad. We get one planet, folks. It's important not to screw it up.
> 
> Also, I read. A lot. On a lot of subjects. It just knocks home my intellectual limits but I do love learning :-) The Ein Sof is a concept in the Kabbalah and like many ancient religious texts was either unknown or 'hidden' from the general public for quite a long time. As were some Dead Sea scrolls, Book of Thomas, of Judas, Enoch and loads of other etc. Bless the Interwebz as they are quite fun to delve into.


	3. A Woman Scorned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mommy Dearest makes an appearance. Completely sane and solvent as always...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Regarding the chapter title, well, you know how the phrase goes, right? Fair warning, this story is breathing a little more than I thought it might so I'm just gonna run with it and see where it goes :-)

Sitting at the desk in her office, Charlotte found herself both intrigued and annoyed by the stacks of folders to her side and the frequency of the irritatingly intermittent ‘bing’ indicating notice of yet another human-scaled disaster landing in her email inbox.

“They all think they’re  **so** important. Following in the empty footsteps of Ozymandias.”

She slapped the laptop shut in piqued disgust.

“Wasting the little time they have on such trivial details in their stunted lives.”

She leaned back in the chair, idly clicking her fountain pen along her bottom teeth.

“Perhaps it’s not their fault. Error in the design.”

The pen stilled, and in a silent snarl of bared teeth she bit down on the end of the Visconti, cracking it.

“Or error in the designer. Yes…that far more likely.”

The widening grin became a terrible and barren wasteland. Long shadows carved the planes of her face and only the whites of her eyes lit with the enthusiastic mania of a true zealot. She sing-songed softly, expression never changing.

_ “…Nothing beside remains. Round the decay _

_ Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare _

_ The lone and level sands stretch far away.” _

“Yes, husband dear…I fear that’s you now. How long have you been absent from this watery rock, from your family…from me? Too long…but perhaps just long enough that Shelley’s words may be true for you? Your creations don’t adore you. Revere you. FEAR YOU. Well, not enough, and not enough of them. You’ve left them alone far too long… _ and how things can twist when neglected.” _

She paused.

“I should know.”

Her eyes narrowed and the seams of skin around them rivened into networks briefly showing her true age under the scarcely tolerated human shell.

“YOU did this to me.”

Her delicately arched brows lowered into the creped mask slashed across her face.

“Made me this. Made me what I am now.  Damaged . Like you made these humans.”

Her words hissed between her clenched teeth. “And those creatures destroy themselves, each other…and even this world they live in…and you’re STILL  gone , other than a quick belch of focused impression every other eon or so. How irresponsible of you.”

Her crackled skin relaxed but the expression did not soften and her smile was ferociously, almost beautifully bloodthirsty. “But  **I’m** not gone. I’m HERE. With your shell-less insects. What might I do with my time since your absent mercies mean so little for any of us…what indeed?”

She paused again, lost in thought. Once more her sclera lit.

“And your tricks hurt one of our sons; not that you care…you’ve ignored the fact he killed another child of ours. Destroyed him, in fact.” For a brief second she screwed her eyes shut and twisted her head cruelly on her elegant neck.

“Lucifer would have never harmed Uriel unless you forced his hand! YOU made Uriel turn against me…by driving me to the brink of insanity!”

Charlotte suddenly whipped the fountain pen away in a vicious arc. It hit the huge window just beside her and stuck en pointe, trembling slightly before the plate glass sizzled with fracture lines and came shattering down. At just that moment, Amenadiel opened the door.

“MOTHER! What’s going on? Are you all right?”

Charlotte took a scant second’s worth of time to compose herself before turning to her son. “Yes, yes…I’m fine.  Thank you, darling . A bird just flew into the glass and *poof* instant wreckage! It was the strangest thing…”

As Amenadiel approached he eyed her, his hackles rising. But she brushed off his look of concern with a tittering simper and asked him to wait while she called someone for repair. Charlotte watched him carefully as she spoke to her assistant, noticing the instant he decided not to question her further and mentally rolled her eyes.  _ This _ son, so brave in his way. But so very simple also, her block-headed leviathan was. Well. Not all of her children had similar gifts and she appreciated the ease with which she could direct this one and those like him. It would make certain…eventual tasks she had in mind far easier.

She took his arm and let him lead her out as a few members of the maintenance crew hustled in. Only half-listening to her child she warmed her face with a slow, sultry smile directed to one of the younger specimens with broad shoulders and predictably vacant look glazing his eyes. These were two of her favorite qualities in human recreational partners and she appreciated her close observation of Lucifer for clueing into the little pastime of sex. These creatures were good for  something , sometimes. Most easily trainable, like good pets were.

“Mom! Pay attention! This is important.”

“What? Oh, yes…do go on…you seem quite troubled.” Charlotte sighed. Again. Still. Honestly. She loved him as she loved all her children but Amenadiel could be so very…heavy within himself. No joy, no verve. Not like…

“…I was  **trying** to tell you, I’m really worried about Lucifer...”

“Oh. Yes, I know. Me too. Has he come back yet? It’s been days. I’m surprised he could stay away from that little human he’s become so enamored of. She must be just…” Charlotte’s voice and expression trilled filthily into an oily smirk. “…beside herself.  **Such** a shame as she’s been through  **so** much recently.”

“Mom.” Amenadiel’s expression and tone were pure rebuke before he shook his head in exasperation. The pair had walked out to the span of grounds between the law office and the parking lot. The area’s attractive landscaping included several benches and tables scattered about the pristine, illegally-watered lawn. He motioned her to sit down at the closest and with mild exasperation she did, smoothing her skirt and crossing her ankles.

With her choice of attentive expression set and hands folded neatly in her lap Charlotte looked closely at him. “Well? What’s so important, son? What’s got you riled?”

“I got a call from Lucifer today.”

“Wonderful! So he is coming back after his little tantrum! When? I would like to smooth things over with him…such an unpredictable child. So very sensitive.”

“No, Mom…it wasn’t a  **good** phone call. He sounds…disturbed. Really disturbed. Like ‘do some damage’ angry.”

“Oh my. Well, that does sound dire, doesn’t it?” Charlotte turned her head aside as she smoothed her skirt again, trying to hide the curl of her smile from Amenadiel.

“MOM! This is NOT a good thing.”

“Oh, isn’t it? Nothing you’ve done or asked and certainly nothing  **I’ve** done or asked has gotten any reaction from your father. Perhaps Lucifer’s ire might do the trick?”

Amenadiel just shook his head incredulously. Just as Lucifer could be, his mother was myopic. Completely unable to see past what she wanted to what might become.

“You do remember Lucifer’s Fall, right? You  do know how badly for him this might go…don’t you care what might happen if he challenges Father again?! I mean, even the humans have their misplaced ideas written about it!”

Amenadiel barely had the words out of his mouth before he was recoiling, or trying to, from the vise-grip of material at his throat. Charlotte had whipped around and lunged at him, her graceful fingers turning talon into the twist of his collar. Choking as he was he could barely hear her low whisper.

“Don’t you think,  not for one moment that I’ve forgotten any pain for any child of mine. How  **dare** you? You’re not a parent: never will be. You’ll  **never** understand a mother’s anguish at having her children hurt…or turned against her. Ever. And you’ll never understand the lengths a parent can go to recover what’s been lost.  _ What’s rightfully  _ **_mine_ ** .”

She released him and he struggled to catch his breath. Coughing, he looked fearfully at her as she patted down the rumple of his shirt.

“There now, son. Let’s not quarrel. Not when things may finally be changing for us. It seems as if….” She interrupted herself, cocking her head to the side, bird-like.

“What, Mom?” Amenadiel was disturbed enough by her brief display of violence, but the predatory look saturating her face through the widening smile was far more frightening.

“Oh, nothing. No matter. I have to go now, son.” She stood and leaned to give him a quick kiss to the side of his head; not even registering his flinch.

Charlotte already had her keys out of her bag before she’d turned away fully. “I’ll call you, and see you soon, all right? We can discuss your little worries then.” Without waiting for a response or looking back she strode purposefully away, ignoring the appreciative glances her long legs got from a few returning to the office from their liquid lunches. No time for idle play, not  now , not when…ooh…so close. SO close and it had been SO long….. She began to smile again and it was terrifying to behold. The ogling looks changed instantly to averted eyes as the humans scattered to the sides of the path to avoid her.

“Yeah…” Amenadiel remained on the bench and watched her stalk towards her car. Having no idea what had just transpired and feeling the malaise in his gut turn malignant he pulled his phone out of his pocket. He held it in his strong hands for a moment, internal debate raging. Then, brow furrowed and decision made he tapped the screen and cradled it to his cheek.

“Hello, Linda? I was wondering if you had plans for lunch…”

He wasn’t the only one making a call. After Charlotte folded herself into the rich leather of her driver’s seat she blasted a series of texts and voicemails, the last to that sorry excuse of a man she kept around merely because he faithfully tended those squeaking vermin he claimed. She had no idea why he’d bother; they’d never amount to anything…not like HER real children would.

_ “I _ **_said_ ** _ , _ I’ll be very busy and am not to be disturbed. Not for ANY reason, do you understand? Good. What? Oh, handle it by yourself. You can manage SOME simple tasks can you not? Fine, I thought so. No, I’ll contact you. No, I don’t know when. NO, do NOT call me.”

Disconnecting and turning off the phone, Charlotte deftly twisted her wrist to fire the engine. She enjoyed the deep purr thrumming through the seat and it made her think of other powerful, well-honed machines. Like herself.

And oh yes…it was with feral grace and agility the car responded to her whims as she raced along the side streets to the freeway.

Humming lightly to herself she began to smile once more, the sing-song lilt returning to her voice, repeating the last line of the poem she’d considered earlier.

_ “The lone and level sands stretch far away…” _

**Her thoughts constricted into a finite point of focused rage. ‘Well, no ‘level sand’ perhaps in your current wasteland but oh, I’ve found you now…and what a reunion it shall be….’ **


	4. Building A Mystery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloe's wheels start catching some traction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I mentioned earlier, it's rare on something multi-chaptered that I don't have it either all laid out neatly (or fully completed) before I post, but...this little story is just breathing on its own. So I'm just gonna let it for the sheer difference in the experience...hope it amuses someone :-)

Detective Decker sat at her precinct desk, face a blank mask of muted concentration tilted in the general direction of the computer screen. Inside her, Chloe was hard at work using the Detective’s sharp tools to carve a solution to this latest, most pressing problem.

Lucifer.

Idiot.

And if she wasn’t careful he was going to make HER an idiot, too.

Bad enough he’d nearly ruined the Detective…really, how does one explain needing to shoot your (irritating) (completely weird) (and that was even before that whole EVEN WEIRDER conversation with Maze, Linda and Ella) partner in the leg? Slap him in the elevator in front of everyone? Grab his ass in *broad daylight* and make suggestive remarks all over the place? And in front of professional colleagues too, no less? The whole unintentional wet-dream performance for Maze had been the sour cherry on top of the shit sundae. Chloe rolled the Detective’s eyes; not caring that her subconscious fantasies weren’t directly Lucifer’s fault; she could blame him anyway.

Him with that toddler on crank personality. The apparent inability to keep his clothes on and libido off. His inconvenient allergy to rationale and children. That incessant barrage of whiplash words and mood swings _(‘I offer as evidence to the Court of Common Sense, Exhibit Ninety-Jillion: Lucifer Morningstar’s current absentee freakout’_ ). That wonderful smile. The kind eyes. The heart she’d never seen the like of in any man…possibly because he  wasn’t  one. It was a confusing mess to say the least, and Chloe did NOT prefer ‘confusing’ as a constant in her life. She was a plotter and planner and ‘figure out-er’. Logic and reason. Head over heart. A familiar if not overly comfortable protective shell she’d long polished.

Until he’d chewed a hole in that armor through sheer pervasation and frequent drop-of-the-hat vulnerability and sacrificial charm.

**Ass.**

Of course he’d saved hers, too. Couple times.

Chloe-inside-the-Detective considered that. For a long time she’d just condensed herself into a flat facet of one persona; sort of a deliberate autopilot what with the dissolving marriage and gruelingly uncomfortable post-Palmetto work thing she had going on last year.

THIS year’s issues included apparently being roommates with an actual-honest-to-god-demon and falling in love with her crispy friend Satan.

Despite herself, one side of Chloe’s mouth quirked up through the Detective’s professional mask. Yes, she loved him.

Idiot redux.

_(she wasn’t sure if she meant him or her or them both together. Probably all of the above)_

Jesus Christ, it was enough to give anyone one hell of a headache.

She decided she probably didn’t want to think on the ‘jesus’ thing too much…having her mind uncomfortably expanded recently meant there were a LOT of other things she’d never given much serious thought to that insisted on existing without her empirical knowledge or permission.

The-now-I-know-why-you’re-scary AF roommate: 

“What Decker? C’mon even your kid didn’t freak out when I showed her this treat. Pretty hot - get it?!”

New friends: 

“Yes, I’ve seen him. HIM. It’s…difficult, but not impossible. Just more sad, really.”

“DUDE! No WONDER he freaks out at church!!! Method my ass, holy shitballs, that’s CRAZYtown, right? But I knew it... ** _just knew_** something was there....”

Molting angels: 

“You need to be careful, Chloe. Uriel may not be the only one of us ‘gone rogue’. And I’ll protect you and yours as I can from any of our…family…in Lucifer’s absence, but I am not what I was. I’m sorry for that. For so many things.”

Since she was still busy rapidly stacking and sorting All This Noisy Nonsense into the tidy files of her mind behind her blank stare Dan had to snap his fingers twice to get her attention.

“Hey Chloe…earth to Chloe…gotta rev up the decaf there…”

“What? Oh hey, sorry. Just thinking.”

“I’ll bet. You looked a million miles away.”

“Yeah…”

“If it makes you feel any better I don’t think he’s actually as far as  that .”

Dan smiled a little. It was sad, but not overly so. Chloe matched it for a different reason with one of her own. She and Dan were a new ‘she and Dan’ and it was all going to be okay. Eventually. Just not quite yet. And that was okay, too. Time heals, blah blah blah.

And Lucifer was a fallen **angel** …maybe he WAS a million miles away. It wasn’t like she’d been offered a manual or anything.

Chloe took a breath and leaned back in her chair, eyes narrowing slightly as she looked at her ex. She didn’t know what, or if, Dan actually knew about their civilian consultant and she sure did not want the precinct to be privy to an Espinoza-sized meltdown if he learned he’d boned A) an actual Goddess and B) Lucifer’s mom. Chloe honestly wasn’t sure which he’d take harder and did not want to find out. However, that didn’t mean she didn’t want to find out some other stuff…

“Hey Dan, I know this is my weekend with Trix and we have great plans tonight…but I was wondering if you could take her tomorrow and Sunday? I have an idea for a lead on…something….and I want to do a little solo legwork.”

“Lead, huh? Sure.” He grinned a little knowingly and she actually felt herself start to blush. Dan covered for both of them by lighting up with pure delight as he continued. “No really Chloe, it’s fine. Perfect, actually. I’d **love** more time with Trixie. Gonna be a gorgeous weekend and there’s a lot we could do.”

“Okay great. That would be really helpful, thank you.” Chloe graced him with one of her real, rare wide smiles. With everything else that had passed between them and the hoops they were still learning to jump through for co-parenting, Dan’s renewed enthusiasm for being a hands-on dad was possibly the best thing to ever come out of the whole mess of their separation and divorce. She loved him for it. Her dad had always meant the world to her and she wanted her daughter to feel the same way about Dan. She leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the cheek as she got ready to hustle out with a few files.

“Thanks again. Gotta get some loose ends tied up on some other stuff. LA hasn’t stopped being any messier just because Lucifer’s not around.”

“Yep, no problem. See you later? Lunch maybe?”

“Yeah. Lunch would be great.”

It would.

With her daughter’s weekend situation settled and knowing she’d be able to take a significant chunk of time to focus on her missing partner, Detective Decker was back in the driver’s seat with reestablished focus. Not matter what else might be going on in her life, work was work and solving problems was where she’d always found satisfaction no matter what else might be going on.

She might be in love with a mystery, but she still had her own to solve. Chloe was still herself, after all.


	5. Tribal Council

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, a flashback. Cheapest fic fix-it ever ;-) And fair warning that Maze is (shockingly, lol) a little abrasive – with reason – regarding Chloe’s past obtuseness because frankly *that* whole ongoing dealio drives me a little nuts. Chloe is an intelligent, perceptive character. Usually. So to have her strung along in the knowledge-deficit void of ‘huh?’ or ‘needing eggs’ rubs me a little bit wrong on her behalf. *kicks soapbox away now* ;-) Some instances of profanity (including the king-daddy cuss word so be warned. Since most of the story does hold the T rating I didn't want to change it just for this, but it DOES fit the situ, so...

 

After the long Friday at work and shorter evening with Trixie, Chloe had actually wound up dropping her off to Dan’s after their mother-daughter movie date.

“You know we’re close to Daddy’s right now, don’t you mom.” It wasn’t a question.

“Yeah of course, Monkey. Why, what’s up?”

“Wellllll….I was just thinking since we’re close, and it **is** getting later…maybe you could just drop me off now?”

Chloe’s heart sank a little as she tried to catch her eye in the rear-view. “Why babe?”

“Because.”

“Because why?”

“Mo-om.” A slightly exasperated sigh rumbled from the backseat. “ **Because** , you’re going to make me go to bed soon anyway, aren’t you? Even though I’m over eight and three quarters and it IS a Friday, right?”

Chloe caught herself just before she snickered aloud at the ‘rationalized-irritable-ness’ simmering off her child.

“Yeah, but what does that have to do with anything?”

“Well….” Trixie said

“Well what?”

“WELL,” Trixie began, as if what she was saying was the most obvious thing in the world, “…you’re going to try to find Lucifer, right?”

Chloe pursed her lip and kept her eyes on the road. The street they were currently traveling down meant she hadn’t committed yet to either taking Trix to Dan’s or back home. “I told you I have to work this weekend. Something came up and I am sorry about that. We talked; I thought you weren’t mad about it.”

“I’m not, Mommy.” A pause. “But you always say honesty is important right?”

“Yes, that’s true. I do and it is.”

“Well, that means for everyone, doesn’t it?”

“Yes, it does.”

“Kids **and** grown-ups?”

“Sure. People in general. All of them.”

“So…I do think ‘something came up’ and you  should  work on it, but I don’t think it’s ‘work’.”

“No?”

“No. And I miss him too, Mom.”

Wow. From the mouths of babes.

“So, if you drop me off now you can get more done faster. You were going to stay up late tonight figuring stuff out anyway…besides…Daddy lets me stay up later on weekends than you do…but don’t tell him I said that! It’s not NOT honest if you just don’t say, right?”

“Trix…” Chloe wasn’t sure where, or even if to begin discussing the myriad range of subjects they’d just broached.

“It’s okay, Mom. I’m good.” And the brilliant grin on her face lit a cheerful flame under Chloe that she badly needed warming on.

Chloe finally let herself laugh. A real one, just like her daughter’s beautiful smile. “When did you get so smart?”

“I always was. I think adults just forget that when it comes to kids sometimes. Not knowing everything doesn’t mean you know nothing. And I know a lot for someone my age.”

‘Yes you do’, Chloe thought. Her daughter had seen and experienced rawness to her life Chloe never would have wished for her, but she was a scrappy, resilient, freakishly perceptive little girl. And what she said made sense. So, “Okay Monkey – give Daddy a call and see if he’s okay with this change in plans.”

“Okay.” Chloe watched as Trixie got her phone out. “But he will be, you know. He loves me. And he’s always glad to see me now.”

Ouch . “Trixie babe, your Daddy’s always loved you and been glad to see you!”

“Oh, I know that. Just now **he** does. I think it’s easier for him to be a daddy to me without being a husband to you. I don’t know why but don’t think it matters. But I’m glad you guys are still friends. So many of my friends’ divorced parents aren’t and it sucks.”

“Trix!”

“Shh…it’s ringing….”

Watching the mischievous gleam in her daughter’s eye Chloe was once again swept up in the realization that her little girl maybe wasn’t so very little after all.

And after  she’d dropped Trixie to Dan’s (and yes, her daughter had been right – he was obviously delighted and seeing them together so happy warmed her even more) and after she’d arrived home to the empty apartment (Maze could be anywhere; between her bounty-hunter job and chosen lascivious lifestyle her roommate had some definitively weird habits)  and after  Chloe had made herself a fresh cup of coffee and gotten out the little ‘Lucifer WTF’ file she’d begun keeping soon after they started officially working together, and  after ALL THAT , she felt her mind ease. Felt the slow seep of the relaxed focus it took to let ideas breathe and clues coalesce into something useful. And it started with that very VERY strange evening when reality as she truly knew had cracked open like a geode revealing sparkling mysteries one would never suspect from the exterior normalcy of plain old rock.

Lucifer’s loft the first night she’d recovered enough to go see him – see why he had not yet responded to any of her overtures since her hospitalization.

~ * ~

It had taken Chloe only a few scant heartbeats to realize that she was most absolutely failing to effectively process what she was seeing in front of her. Or **not** seeing, rather. Lucifer. Recent signs and symptoms of Lucifer, even. The empty pall that lay over the penthouse was more obscuring than the visual hush of pale drapery over the furniture…and the beloved piano. His soother, abandoned. Like he’d done her.

Silent.

Empty.

Alone.

Again.

He’d disappeared.

AGAIN.

And it hurt just as much as it had the first (second? twelfth?) time and she wasn’t even pointing a gun at him this round.

She could still feel the echoes of her own voice calling his name in the hollow rooms, and she was suddenly struck by a fervent wish to call him a bunch of OTHER things.

She’d nearly died. Again (really bad habit she couldn’t seem to kick. Like a freaking TV drama her life was getting to be; so ridiculous). Surely the universe was asking a little much of her to deal with this shit right now, too.

And alone. Still.

Suddenly Chloe snapped herself out of her typical emotional cock-block. She wasn’t alone, not really…only if she chose to be. And for the first time in quite a while, she chose differently from her norm.

Whipping her phone out of her pocket, slender fingers made quick work orchestrating their trembling dance upon the screen.

Staring at it while waiting for responses seemed like years. Like eons.

However it was actually only seconds and Chloe had barely begun to register that timely fact when a rather rattled-looking Linda started smoothing back her hair and Maze was fixing her with the familiar stare of her unique blend of caustic benevolence.

“I was just expecting a text! Or a call - how did you guys get here so fast?”

“Well, we were in Lux, so….”

“Uh-uh,  no . No more. This bullshit is seriously getting old and we’ve got stuff to address properly. It’s time. Way past if you ask me. Which you didn’t but I don’t care.”

“Maze…I don’t think…”

“ Linda  , you think too **much**. Anyway don’t worry, I got this. It worked on you, right?”

Chloe felt like she was watching a championship ping-pong match with the speed in which her focus shifted between the two. “What are you even talking about?  Where’s Lucifer ? All I want to know is what the hell is going on!”

“Okay Decker, I’m no fairy godmother, but you should be more careful what you wish for, ‘cause I’m gonna show you  what the Hell is going on  once and for all.”

It seemed like Maze moved the five feet separating them before the sound of her words had even reached Chloe’s ears. She found her arms caught in the vice-grip of Maze’s hands and wondered for the umpteenth time how someone so delicate-looking could be so strong.

And then she wondered about absolutely NOTHING as her mind was wiped blank.

Her (roommate) (fierce friend) (occasional thorn in her side) (…inexplicable mystery…?) was staring at her practically nose to…what? **With** what?

Haunting eyes; both of them. The familiar dark amber of one and the pearly stormcloud of the other fixed her in place like a pinned butterfly under glass. Mazikeen’s face, still so lovely on one side but the other…

An acid-shredded network of exposed tendon and grotesque spiderweb flesh stretched over the elegant structure of her bones. The sharply feral shine of her teeth glowed from it, but **that** was no **smile**.

No HUMAN smile, anyway.

What the HELL?

 _‘…oh…exactly._ _exactly_ _that…_ ’ was the smallest spark of geodesic lucidity Chloe was currently capable of. She dimly heard Linda’s soothing voice as if across the gulf of her understanding of what reality was supposed to be and what it actually  **was** .

“It’s all right Chloe. She’s still just the same old Maze you’ve always known.” Funnily enough, it was the dual facts of Linda NOT freaking out AND the slightly self-depreciating tone in her voice that jogged Chloe back into herself.

Her logical brain took about point 3 nanoseconds to go from a blithering shriek of reactionary nonsense to enough organized neuronal input to mutter one single solitary word in the most deadpan voice she could manage.

“Seriously?”

Another infinitely vast few seconds of silence. Then…

“That’s it?” This from her two-faced _(literally two-faced, wtf!!)_ roommate. Maze had real pride blooming in her voice as she released the talon-grip on Chloe’s arms to cross her own, pleased that despite the Richter-worthy shudders rattling her the woman did not actually collapse.  Yes  . This human friend had more potential than she’d hoped for! It would be interesting to see how **much** more, considering.

The evaluation Linda was giving her was equally intense. “Wow. Good for you. I couldn’t speak for about an  hour  after Lucifer revealed his face to me. Fairly certain I was in an acute fugue state – hadn’t even realized he’d left until my office assistant came looking for me. You’re showing remarkable resilience, Chloe.”

“Yeah, she’s a practically a miracle.” Both Linda and Chloe noticed the extra inoculation of sarcasm dripping through Maze’s wry drawl, but considering everything else they decided to let it go for the moment.

“So you knew? You’ve known about them? Like, really known?” Chloe was directing this line of questioning at Linda while simultaneously heading unsteadily for one of the draped couches. Sitting was a better option than dropping, for sure. “For how long?”

Linda followed over to join her. “Since Halloween, actually.”

“And you never said anything?!”

Maze started turning up the heat on the sear required for Chloe’s elucidation. “Decker, Lucifer has been telling your dumb ass from the jump that he was the Devil. From  Hell  . You know, of the fire and brimstone variety? And what did you think that made **me** , huh? When I decided I was no longer going to find you repugnant…”

 _C’mon brain, I know you’ve just taken quite a hit but this is MAZE and she doesn’t do weak so,_ “…thanks for small favors…” Chloe interrupted to mutter in her general direction through the fingers laced over her face.

The faltering quip was the right call; the powerful demon was grinning on the inside to see some spirit flare. Good. Her human would need it; there was more work coming.

“You’re welcome. It’s a big deal for me, actually. You and your kid – well, more your kid - were my ‘gateway drugs’ into not considering all humans as total scum, which is pretty awesome considering MY ROLE in PUNISHING the disgusting caliber of mortal nasty I’ve entertained for LITERALLY MILLENIA. Now shut up and *really listen* since you have NOT been for so long. To others OR yourself. Y’know, for an otherwise intelligent human and a half-decent detective you’ve been incredibly block-headed about this whole thing.”

“ What?! ” Chloe scrubbed her hands over her face then dropped them, glaring and dearly wishing she had a drink or six in front of her. Damn that Lucifer for packing up all the glasses. Well, maybe since an actual hellion was here fussing at her on his behalf, Chloe guessed he was already damned plenty and she didn’t need to add more fuel to that fire. She modulated her voice, looking at Maze’s cordoned disaster of a face and wondered how disturbing Lucifer’s was. She’d have to ask Linda, but she triaged it for later. Current reality desperately needed a reboot first.

Bearing the cacophony of Maze’s demonic voice and sheer onslaught of everything else, Chloe completely missed the fact that she didn’t find the idea of Lucifer’s damage repelling; just appallingly strange to consider. But the small desk lamp by the elevator suddenly flicked on with a warm glow, not that any of the three noticed it.

“What do you mean? How was I supposed to take what you guys said seriously…do you know how many freaks a cop runs into on the daily? Especially in LA? Gimme a break.”

Maze didn’t let it go, and shot Linda a frigid glower as the doctor closed one hand comfortingly over Chloe’s left knee. Soothing wasn’t part of this process. Not just yet.

“Right, and it’s completely logical to let what you thought was a clearly delusional person work with you instead of sending him straight off to the funny farm. And **_I mean_ ** , genius, that it wasn’t  just  what he  said  . Or  **I** said. It was what was happening right in front of your stuck-up-LA-perfect-nose! First off, Lucifer’s pull with humans – might not work on you, but you sure have had a front row seat to see it working on tons of other people. And we’re both crazy strong. Travel *awfully quickly* sometimes. Heal fast…he actually never used to get hurt from mortals at ALL before YOU, but Lucifer was  gut shot and bled out  in front of you on that filthy freaking hanger floor and not seconds later was saving your daughter’s life AND yours AGAIN and you never even blinked! How stupid **are** you?! Total shit for brains with this, I swear!”

Chloe put a hand up to stave off this onslaught. Maze was furious all right, but she wasn’t sure why. And it was too hard to think clearly under the barrage of words flying from the maw of that tangled mess of facial insanity. “I had a blood sample from that night, but I never tested it, so…”

“Exactly! What kind of crap cop instinct is THAT? But even so, even without a lab test…he’s running around working with you TWO DAYS LATER instead of being laid up on life support and that doesn’t trip any of your breakers either?  Your ex  is an idiot, too. Saw Lucifer without a shirt on during that Russkie sting op and never thought twice about him not having a SCAR from that on his belly? Come ON.”

Without speaking of them, all three suddenly found their thoughts tugged to the very obvious scars remaining on Lucifer’s back, and while their reasons were different they were all equally poignant. Linda was the first to recover herself.

“Maze. I think you’re being a little harsh. This is very new.” Linda kept her hand on Chloe’s knee, but shifted her weight to square her shoulders the demon. Maze was successful at hiding the proud twist of her more twisted lip at this human friend’s strength as well, but kept her tone curt.

“No, Linda, it’s NOT new. It’s been since the beginning. And there’s been a lot more nonsense that I haven’t mentioned, but you get the point by now I hope. Both of you. And by the way, neither of you have seen me truly ‘be harsh’ yet nor any human living or otherwise wants to, of that I assure you.” But the demon did take a breath and removed the growl from the bowels of hell from her voice. The intensity however remained as this was **so** important,  now  more than ever…

“Decker.” A sigh. “ **Chloe** . C’mon. Now that you know what’s up you need to have your gut instincts on the front burner. You  have  to do what Lucifer told you so long ago and trust yourself. Really commit. You’re not incapable which is why I’m being this assertive.”

“Aggressive.” Spectacled rebuke from the couch.

“Whatever. And since I haven’t even told you the half of it yet you’d better juice up your spidey sense from now on because things are gonna get much weirder. ”

“WHAT THE HELL?! Ay dios mio - holy  SHIT  , _what the_ **_ACTUAL_ ** _HELL??!”_

Three faces turned to the outburst, but only two were human.

Giving the newly arrived and right up-to-this-second unnoticed Ella a blank stare, Maze just remarked, “Well that slapped adolescent owl facial expression wasn’t really the kind of weird I was talking about, but okay, let’s do this now too. It’ll save time if we get it all over with at once.”

The foursome found (after a few minutes in plying inconsolable banshee screeches in a combination of English, Spanish, profanity and prayer-fragment the likes of which could blister the color out of even the Basilica’s stained glass) that sitting on the floor in a circle and passing around one of Lucifer’s prettiest (and most full) wall bottles helped things start to settle down. After a recalibrated Ella kept insisting on running inquisitive fingertips over Maze’s hellish cheek, the demon restored herself with a huff; something that Chloe and Linda found much easier to take as well. Maze could be abrasive enough all by herself, for sure.

Linda, master of ideological scaffold, began. “All right. He’s definitely gone and it looks as if he intended it for be for a while at least.” She glanced briefly at Chloe and murmured ‘sorry’ to which Chloe just clenched her jaw and gave a dismissive ‘whatever, it’s okay enough’ shake of her head before the doctor continued. “So the question is, what do we do now?”

“Nope, the question is not ‘what’, because there are actually a  lot  of things that need doing. The **real** question is ‘in what order’ because there is some serious weird you all need to hear.” Maze barely got to finish her sentence before a small hand darted out and whisked the heavy flask from her hands.

“Oh,  terrific . Mind-Bomb: Level-Up. Gimme that bottle; my head’s not chill enough for more serious fuckery yet.”

Chloe, Linda and Maze watched with expressions of corresponding awe, concern and unequivocal admiration as Ella effortlessly tipped several large swallows down her reedy throat. Finishing, she swiped the back of her wrist against her mouth, gave a sharp nod and belched out a garble of noises.

“ChaDo'maq yIqIp!”    

“Um, okay. Wow.”

“Oh my.”

“Worthy adversary.”

It was with only minor slurring that Ella informed them, “No worries, ladies. I have a high metabolic rate. Liver function on fleek, yo.”

The little tribe was startled by a deep voice coming in from the back staircase.

“Unfortunately, perhaps there is a more adversarial aspect than you’re aware of, Maze. Glad to see you’re all together…” Amenadiel looked slightly askance at the floor party before continuing, “…like this. I have some news.”

“Oh great,” Chloe mumbled. “’Cause, y’know it’s not been bizarre enough already or anything.”

Looking slightly uncomfortable at the idea of sitting cross-legged in their little circle like a band of delinquent preschoolers, Amenadiel still allowed himself to be tugged down between Maze and Linda. When a slightly bleary-eyed Ella leaned forward to poke quizzically at him Maze slapped her hand away.

“You know what you humans say about curiosity and cats, right?”

“That only the cool ones can be real hipsters and I don’t think he is? What’s with the noggin-waffle anyway, man? That is a stupendously outlier wacko halo-substitute for an angel. Way.”

Chloe shushed her. After dropping his chin (and pocketing his beanie: he **loved** it so everyone else could just kick off!) then glaring in exactly the same way Lucifer did Amenadiel finally began to speak, telling them about the ‘piece or peace is already here’ phrase Uriel taunted Lucifer with when he was in Hell.

“What do you think that means? He’s pattern-guy, right? So the doing and the telling are probably both important.”

Still unnoticed, the desk lamp flared briefly before going dark.

Amenadiel replied darkly, “I’m not sure, Maze. Lucifer wasn’t either, but I don’t know that this little ‘clue’ is at the forefront of his mind anymore.” He looked down for a second and sighed before continuing. “But Uriel got that blade from Azrael somehow. He’d said, ‘when she wasn’t paying attention’. Don’t think it was a pretty process.”

The demon looked uncharacteristically thoughtful as she agreed, saying, “Yeah maybe, but there’s nothing pretty about your sister, either. Not. At. All.”

“Sister?”

“Yeah **sister** , Decker.  Sort of  ….”

Unfortunately none of them knew the full scope of all Uriel’s actions. And the true meaning of his words; including the fact that he’d not meant ‘peace’ at all, but ‘piece’. IN pieces actually and the deadly weapon that was smashed into shatters of annihilation could have the splintered segments used to slice other lives short.

And it wasn’t just her blade, that deceptively simple appearance of Asmodai, which was capable of this damage. Azrael herself was  far  more formidable.

And damaged or not she was here. On this plane of existence.

And she was a creature of pure function.

~ * ~

So knowing what she did now and knowing Lucifer as she did too, Chloe’s next steps suddenly became crystal clear. She reached for her phone, galvanized by the prospect of action.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ella has said, ‘hit the spot’ in Klingon because she’s nerdily cool like that ;-)


	6. Pause, (Not for Effect)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is actually just a place-holder and excuse. I'm someone who tends not to read WIPs often simply because I'm wary of being left twisting in the wind if a writer leaves a fic too long, and I don't want to do that here. Generally, if I'm writing more than a one-shot I write *the whole thing* out (often in a non-linear fashion), then fiddle with it a bunch before I post just make sure things make sense. When I started this it was only intended to be about three chapters but it began to breathe a little bit more than I'd expected. On two areas in particular, and I sort of want to suss out where those are going more effectively (teaser for one: Azrael's creation/role and relationship to Lucifer and Mum is a biggie ;-). Alas, rl is VERY DAMN RUDE at the moment and the few unfrazzled neurons I have left are being uncooperative bastards.
> 
> So, I could either abandon this, or take a step back and write in the manner I usually do. Since fic is a fun escape to write and read, and escape is welcome I'd rather go with the latter :-) When the story comes back it'll be with some bells and whistles and *maybe* some little extra trappings as well. So, for those who have been reading - thank you!!! And we'll just see what happens...

See summary. This 'chapter' will be replaced with a real one when it starts back.


End file.
